something i don't miss.

Day 26th of being stuck in my uni. I hope this pandemic ends soon. 

Yesterday I saw something posted by a senior. It was a video of her juniors having fun. Then it got me thinking, it's been so long since I, had such fun. The fun that I mean it, having a group of friends - doing totally nonsense activity - cracking jokes - making each other laugh. The last time I did that sort of thing was probably when I was 17. But honestly, I don't really remember. Certainly, not when I am in uni. There is this group that offers me a community, but I... always avoid them. I don't think, I fit in. Sharing gospel is part of their life. When I'm with them, I don't want to hear that. I wish they would just focus on, supporting each other as humans, instead of focusing on - religion or God. So, I was never a part of their community. I can't. Here, that's the only community that exists. Maybe I should say the only community that I could try to be part of. Because I'm not good at anything else, I don't have other interests that I like enough to find its community here. Basically, I'm a lone wolf here. It's so weird. Seeing how I live my life now. I think I'll always be alone now. Being part of a community does not suit me. I'm awkward. I don't like, having too many people around. I'm also too negative for others. I might not be a good influence to others. So, it's actually better if I am alone.