Hello darkness my old friend.

Where do I even start?

I hate work.

I hate my job.

I hate the people at my job.

As always, there's nothing I can do about it.

I hate my job but I don't have another choice. 

I hate the people at my workplace but I can't say anything to them.

I work like a dog every day but nobody sees it. They don't fucking care about my workload but they get furious when I didn't mention their 'heavy' workload at the meeting. 

I know people are selfish, all they care about is themselves. That was so fucking annoying though. I still can't get over it. 

Everything annoys me. I want to give up but I don't have the privilege to do so. I need money. Which means I need to work. At the moment, this is the only job that I am qualify for. I'm not good at it, but I can manage. I'm not sure for how long. It's getting way too toxic here. Everyone wants to have their way. They don't fucking care about your mental health here. They don't fucking care about the effects of whatever they do or say. I don't give a fuck about them either but I never say something that might hurt others. Or have I? But I know I never say something to compare my own ability and others'. When someone complained about a task they were assigned, my first respond was never "You can do it because I had no problems doing it.". So what if you were able to do it? Am I you? Are you me? Are we the same person? It's such an insensitive response. I hear it many times in many different ways. They all mean the same. That's why I hate it here. It's getting too toxic for me. I'm not saying there's no good people here. There are. But the toxic bunch are the majority. I can't stand it.

Aside from the toxic bunch, there's also the pervert bunch of assholes. I'm always the target because I'm young and not married. If killing was legal I would have killed them long ago. I hate that I have to laugh off their disgusting sexual jokes and I have to pretend to be oblivious when they are obviously scanning my body. They are so sick. They are not even ashamed of themselves. I hate it. I fucking hate them. The only fucking thing they care about me is when I am gonna get married. As long as I'm not married, they are going to keep making their sick jokes. Now how the fuck am I gonna stop having to put up with this because I know I'm not gonna get married anytime soon, or ever. What do I do? I can only wish that I would be gone or they would be gone. Fucking assholes. I pity their wives and daughters for having such sick fathers. 

How do I believe in god when people like this still exist, unpunished in this world? 

I'm so tired, so angry, so sick of everything.