Please they are so cute. Why am I not as cute?

That's a great picture. Why do I like it so much? I'm not sure. 

So I've been thinking...what the heck is wrong with me. I stop liking someone only to like someone who is an even worse person to develop feelings for. A kid.

Perhaps it's just my hormones.

I've seen him so many times before but why is it only now I am really noticing him? And I think it's also because he reminds me of masaki suda. I keep looking at suda's face to see if they really resemble each other. They don't. That's just what I want to believe.

Last night I read what I wrote about my colleague. It makes me wanna dig a hole to bury myself. That was humiliating. Like did I really like him that much? I don't think so. I think it was my hormones even back then. Today I tried my best not to talk to him. And he ignored me as well. Even though I wanted to comment on his hairstyle so badly. He had a new hairstyle today. But I couldn't even look his way because I was scared that our eyes would meet and then I would have to talk to him. I managed to avoid conversation with him today. I hope tomorrow will be another successful day. It's our last day of working before the holidays. I need to reduce our interactions as much as I can. Good luck to me.

Anyway, about my feelings for some kid. Ugh. I hate it. I can't develop feelings for some kid. Am I too lonely that even some kid looks attractive to me? Damn it. What the hell is wrong with me? Though I have to admit that it's a good distraction. It really helps me to forget about him. However, I need to get over this feeling fast. If it develops deeper, I will be in trouble. The police will be out to get me. I can't be a predator.

This post is so random. Everything is all over the place. But that's also how it is in my head.